These people can go fuck themselves so far up the ass until the elbow disappears and it starts to envelope shoulders.

By law in this retarded little country I have to pay for a “license” to use a TV just because it is capable of receiving a broadcast RF signal. This is to fund, ta da, the BBC. I do not watch the BBC, I do not use their services and as a result, I do not want to fucking pay them any cunting money.

But apparently just because my TV can accept an RF signal I owe them for it. I don’t just owe them for it on a flat rate either. By paying a direct debit for a 6 month period they automatically want me to pay for an entire fucking year over those 6 months, and then continue paying the full amount over the next year too.

To me that suggests they get 6 months of extra money out of me, for fuck all, whilst raking in the interest generated from every other poor cunt that makes use of the service.

“Can’t I just pay on a monthly basis, for what I owe on a monthly basis?” I asked.

*Confused silence*
“Er no sir, you have to pay the set amounts in advance”

“But I don’t want to pay you double for a service I won’t even use, why is it up to me to claim it back? Can’t I just pay what I actually owe per month?”

“We like our customers to be ahead in their payments”

“I’m sure you do, it means you get double the money owed for no particular reason and then it’s up to me to claim it back. I don’t want to do it that way, I just want to pay, what I owe, on an monthly basis”

*More confused sounds*
“Sir this is our policy, we can’t just make a policy up to suit you”

Yeah that’s right, something logical, fair and that disallows you guys to make money out of my already taxed wages sounds a completely fucking TERRIBLE idea doesn’t it. The interest they must make out of the entire number of people in this country overpaying by £70 odd quid a year must be astronomical. Imagine 10 million households in the country have a license, that’s 700 million pounds a year they’re sat on for fuck all, making interest on it.

I appreciate interest rates aren’t through the roof right now but even at 1% they’re looking at 7 million pounds a year interest just in overpayments, and they still make the most pathetic TV content in the world.

The worst part about this, is not the fact its a business trying to rip people off, which it clearly fucking is; its the fact that people are LEGALLY BOUND to pay them. They don’t try and work out if you have a TV  in the fist place, you just get sent threatening letters of fines automatically.

Apparently its their “policy” to setup rip off direct debits in this way to finance pigshit television that about 10% of the country can relate to - and no one has a fucking choice about how to pay for it, or even it seems, how much, because it’s breaking the law to tell them to fuck off.

It’s an absolute disgrace, I can see why the government would never scrap this system as its a license to print cocking money. What else do you know where you have to not only pay for a service you’ve not yet used up front, but the emphasis actually gets placed onto you to claim back what you don’t use because it’s their “policy”.

I paid for the TV, I pay for the electricity to make it work, I pay for the house to use it in, I pay for the Sky subscription so I can watch the channels on that network. Why the fuck should I owe someone else money when I’ve already paid every other mother fucker holding their hand out.

What if I ring up in the next 3 months or so and tell them I’m unhappy with the level of service, quality of programming and I want my fucking money back. Oh that’s right, its a legal requirement to buy a “license” for a television set so there is nothing I can do at all.

Absolute, prime examples of complete and utter cunts.

Fuck off and die horribly anyone who works for the TV licensing company, anyone at the BBC, anyone related even in the loosest sense. Just leave me alone and get a worth while fucking job and a better existence.